Happy New Year Pie
Happy New Year! Happy New Year!
Many of you may have been wondering where I have been or what has happened? And I honestly don’t have a better answer than – I got a little scattered.
I’m not one for making excuses because I don’t believe in them. However, I do believe in explaining myself. Since the end of October, I started a new job. And with this new job came a new way of living. I now have an “imposed” working schedule, which I was somewhat unaccustomed to. For the past 5 years, I essentially set my own schedule. I was either in grad school and working on my journalism pieces or in law school and working around my classes. Yet, even with the set classes, I felt as though on most days I was in control of my day and most importantly my time.
And then I had this wondrous break between the bar exam completion and starting work. And although I wanted my job to start, mainly because I was looking forward to a paycheck, I relished my last days of true freedom. I cherished my last moments of controlling my schedule, which for me meant dedicating large chunks of time to being with the Lord. I would spend the entire morning reading the bible, doing bible study, journaling and blogging. And I honestly felt like I was experiencing heaven on earth. {I may have been!}
So, now I am struggling with having to be somewhere {work} at a certain time and my 40-45 minute commute. And I will be honest. It has been a struggle for me and I have been resisting…. the change. I have longed for my life before the job. But more than ever, I longed for my beautiful, sunny Los Angeles {especially when it rains here in Northern California}. I’ve been praying about all of this. Heck, I’m still praying about all of this.
My prayer has been that I need Jesus to come into my heart and soften it. I need the Holy Spirit’s energy within me to allow me to relax into my new rhythm. And I’ve been praying, asking, and affirming that it will be so. {And a couple of bible verses have helped me along the way.}
“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us and eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 ESV
And I believe that Jesus has heard and answered my prayers. No, I don’t now have a love affair with San Francisco, or rejoice when it rains. But God is now allowing me to see more beauty in the Bay Area, appreciate the rain, and slowly {very slowly} settle into my new routine and commute.
I don’t know how you all are with change, but I have an interesting relationship with it. I am one of the first people to make changes in my life because I am not scared of change. In fact, I’ve been told that I courageously take risks that others wouldn’t dare to take {that’s because I have God}. Yet, admittedly, the changes don’t always come easy.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and he will make straight your paths.” Proverbs 3:5 ESV
Yet I realize that I don’t have to deal with any of these changes, and feeling scattered, and on my own. I have God. I can lean on Him. He will get me through this time of change. And these times of change have a point – to remind me that I need to lean into Jesus. I need to rely on God and the Holy Spirit who dwells in me.
“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
I constantly need these reminders. And I constantly need prayer and alone time with God.
So, dear readers, please pray for me and with me. My prayer is that I beautifully and peacefully adjust to my new life rhythm. That the Lord wakes me up in the morning (even earlier) so that I can spend even more time with Him. And I pray that God continues to awaken me to the power of his love and grace, and the futility of worry and trying to do things on my own. I pray that God continues to use me as a servant to tell his message of hope, joy, peace, love, grace, and forgiveness on this site. And so it is done in Jesus’ name, Amen.
Meanwhile, I have started planning some exciting things for this blog for 2013. One of the upcoming things is a new (in)courage.me bible study, where we will be studying Greater by Steven Furtick. I’m so excited about it. Get your book now! There will be more details to come.
I’m looking forward to continuing to share my journey with God in 2013!
wishing you much hope, joy, and peace,
Hope